what to do with so much limbo?

I am drifting in and out of  today, wandering around and around, waiting for something to grab ahold of me and force me to focus, but I cannot seem to find anything to do just that. Last night I worked on a portrait late into the night, today I tore it to pieces, and I never do that. Feeling a little despondent, it was bound to happen, it always does....what goes up must come down.  I have this sense of longing smothering me, longing for parts of myself that I have given up or left behind, longing for people that are no longer a part of my life, longing for yesterday, when I wasn't feeling like this.  Here's where I am, thinking about the past and the future, trying hard to get out of the moment, because today I just don't feel like being in the moment. I don't feel like dealing with all that needs to be dealt with today.  I know just how Forest Gump felt when he wanted to run and keep on running.   I can remember the last time we moved I felt these same feelings, feeling in-between the now and then and just wanting to get to where I was going, wanting so much to skip all the packing & cleaning. Our house is a bit torn up, as you can imagine a house with an art studio, a full pottery studio, years of accumulating so much stuff, and two little kids, would be during a move. It feels so good to be purging and letting go of so very much, but comes with reflection of what used to be. I know these feelings I am having today will pass, they always do... I love how my friend put it perfectly this morning...."you are in such limbo".    

In a week from now I will be teaching a class in one of my favorite states, Utah, at Artnest...how lovely that will be, and two weeks from now I will be with my family,surrounded by the mountains of Virginia, looking for a new place to live, imagine that, and three weeks from now I have no idea where I will be...that is just too far to think about, but if I had to guess, I would say that I will be in a tropical paradise, eating avocados for breakfast right off the tree, sipping a lassi, and dancing the flamenco.

The big news is that my daughter is now a first grader, so hard to grasp, but I smile thinking of how much she has grown into this sweet little girl. Such a beautiful time of life, being five, do you remember?  I think my first memories are about when I was just that age. My son and I truly love having her here with us all day.  We have been having a great time, playing outside, building blanket forts, hanging out at the beach,  sharing time with friends, taking walks, and most of all.... being sillllllllllllllly. My children are the best reminders of what life is all about, they are so full of kindness, happiness, love, patience, acceptance,and forgiveness, I know that I can learn from them daily, when I keep myself open to it.

Yesterday was a  wonderful day, that could even be the reason for my quiet feelings today.  Melanie (who is having a birthday...Happy , happy birthday dear Melanie...please do wish her a wonderful day) and I made a jaunt to visit with our friend Kateri and her friend Stephanie.  It was a day filled with warm conversations over tea, delicious food, and a long walk through a most enchanting old farm that felt like a dream-land (where most of these photos were taken). Days like these are the kind you treasure forever, wishing they could last longer and be more often. When I got home and asked my son what his favorite part of his day was, he said..."when you got home"....i just melted.

Tomorrow is another day.....  "You can become blind by seeing each day as a similar one. Each day is a different one, each day brings a miracle of its own. It's just a matter of paying attention to this miracle.”  ~ Paulo Coelho

Thank you all so much for your kind comments about my latest work. I do hope to list it on Etsy soon. 

namaste

Comments

[Cindy Dean]

I don't envy your limbo. I have been there too many times in my life as the wife of a military man. I am glad that stage is over for me as he is retired from the Air Force now. I too am looking forward to going to Utah and ArtNest. I know it will be wonderful and I can't wait to learn from you. I will be driving up so if you need anything you can't get onto an airplane...just holler...or if you think of anything you would like from Las Vegas... See you next week!

[Laurie G. (morningk)]

I too am looking forward to ArtNest. What a wonderful feeling to be among kindred spirits sharing art and laughter and discovery. ".... Life's a bonus dream!" :) Namaste.

[Jo Stables]

I gasped in shock when I read you had torn up a piece of your work! Send all the pieces to me!!!
Moving houese and home can tend to a feeling of being detached, your mind is in the future, with your heart pondering the past.
You do however have many adventures to look forward to. I wish you many blessings on your move.
The photos of the farmhouse are magnificent, what an amazing place to visit. And your son, what a little treasure. He will be a heart breaker one day!
Cheers,
Jo
Australia

[Kala]

I so know how you feel, we are in the same limbo, our little place waiting to sell, have our belongings already packed up and a new house already found. A mixture of uncertainty, excitement and displacement. Good luck and best wishes! Karen xx

[Kateri]

Limbo. I've a different kind of limbo, but maybe it affects the soul the same. Mine isn't going to rmemedy itself anytime too soon, but you know what sweet Misty? It's teaching me to roll with it. Carpe Diem kind of thing. But I must say, when I was supposed ot move last year? I dreaded the packing and unpacking! For me I think it was just laziness, but also a bit of leaving something important behind...many years of a life lived with those things in that cupboard, you know? Keep looking forward to the excitement of a new place, but let yourself lull in the sadness, too. You are doing great. All those emotions are really, really important. But it's hard in the midst of it. I'm thinking about you...

And the photos are so beautiful! The colours! :-) It is nice to see what I see so often through your eyes.

[Corey Moortgat]

I can resonate with your sense of limbo, having just survived a cross-country move. It's a feeling I don't envy you- such a time of chaos and, as you said, longing. Sending you good thoughts to get through it...

[Sharon at Norah'S]

I recognize your limbo. I call it my art anxiety attack. You describe it so well sweet Misty. Breath.
Thank you for sharing your adventure. Seeing it through your eyes is a spectacular view.
xoxo

[Delia]

Thinking of you during this transitional time..."you just cross over".
Love,
D.

[amanda]

finding balance in that state of limbo is so difficult. but you always seem to be so aware of your feelings and are able to pay attention to the small moments that bring you so much joy. wishing you magic movers to have it all done for you overnight...
xx

[Elise B.]

I understand limbo too and how uncomfortable it can be...

I am waiting to hear the results of some tests about my health so I am on pins and needles...

What helps is to know that I have such wonderful support and I do have a great life...

it's easier to let go when you know you have done right for yourself and your loved ones...there is nothing else to do or that really needs to be done...

Love,

Elise

[Molly]

The first picture, the light, so amazing. I know limbo--I know it professionally most recently. The last few days of school, where my things were in boxes, there were still students taking exams, and my posters left dark marks on the walls. I felt so quiet inside then, too, looking at these things in a different way, as they will never be in the same place again, and yet... We just have to hold our breath and make it through and say goodbye and love what is next. I haven't been sad since I left, though for the past two nights, I've dreamed about my old school, which is strange. Moving on is strange. I'll be thinking of you and your beautiful family!

[la vie en rose]

the quote you ended this post with was just what i needed to read today...thank you! i've been blind too long...it's time to see the miracles.

[Lina]

I know how you are feeling, especially the part about longing for parts of myself that i left behind and the people who are no longer part of my life. I have been thinking about that for a while now, and also feeling the sadness...It's hard to come out of that sometimes, but we always do i guess.
THe quote was amazing, i needed to hear it as well. Here's to seeing the beauty of every new day and letting go of the not so great parts of our yesterdays...

[colorsonmymind]

Oh how much I wish I was going to be at artnest.

Great photos - of the barn-the bird and you and that beautiful first grader.

XOXO

[Kimberly Wlassak]

At one time, Limbo was my life. We moved many times in a 6 year period with three little kids. At the time, it was so difficult, I didn't know how I would make it. But you know, now that I'm older, when I think back on those times, they were the sweetest of all. The financial hardships and many moves aren't what stand out at all. I remember laughter and family and my toddlers!!

I still feel in limbo sometimes and I am a naturally melancholy person, but...I've found that those are the same feelings that allow me to nurture and love and continue on!!

Kim
Garden Painter Art

[samm]

come here to us and we could share our limbos together xoxo oh and a lassi or two!

[fran welch]

some of my best work has come from the pieces...the pieces of broken sculpture or ripped up canvas....they found new meaning in a collage piece ....and helped me see my life differently... art the healer...and the photos look like an ethereal dream. as always an inspiration.

[kristen]

Your photos here are ethereal and stunning Misty. I now have a first grader too and it's a delicious age - truly.

Being in limbo has never felt comfortable to me. I'm a true nomad in my heart, but in reality my feel are firmly planted. I think it's always good to shake the roots and feel uncomfortable because on the other side of all that, is momentum.

[kelly snelling]

take gentle steps as you journey forward, careful to only glance behind until you catch the wind and can fly straight on to three weeks ahead. flamenco! flamenco! until you shake off this limbo.

[maigirlz]

You will find happiness where ever you go dear Misty!

[Lina]

Thank you so much for the birthday wishes!!! Have fun at Artnest!!

[Jamie]

It sounds like you are making good use of your limbo time. I am so excited for you and your family!!! I envy your Artnest time. What a fabulous experience that will be. It's a fabulous concept and one I hope to experience in the future. I love your farm house pictures. Your skill with the camera has really blossomed. You see the world with an artist's heart. Love,Jamie

[AscenderRisesAbove]

It has been a long time since I have dropped by your inspiring site; was amazed to find another in limbo.

Wonderful photos and art throughout. Say; is that door hung upside down? it sure makes one look!