transiting

I am not where I want to be right now, but it's really hard to complain.  I should be in flight to Melbourne, with just a few more hours to go, but instead I am in a fancy schmancy airport hotel in LA.  I arrived in LA just as my connecting flight was taking off, so I won't be headed to Melbourne until later this evening.  I have the whole day to unwind, which I think is a good thing after how I was feeling yesterday.  No doubt, yesterday sucked!  I was miserable all day, sulking and crying on and off until I left, unable to pull myself together for those in my presence, even after being showered with the most precious handmade gifts from my sweet little peas, knowing how excited they were to give them to me and that it was the day to celebrate me, their mom, but I was too wrapped up in my own self pity to be completely in the moment for them, and thank God they love me as they do and can overlook my flaws so easily, wish I could say the same for myself.   I wanted so much to post yesterday, wishing all of you mother's out there a lovely mother's day. I wanted to write my own mom a poem to let her know I was thinking so much about her and feeling sad that I couldn't be with her for the first time for Mother's day, how awful that felt to not be with her, even if hearing her voice calmed me, and even knowing she will be there at my house when I come home from this big adventure, I still couldn't see the big picture.  It was inevitable that I would feel this way on the day leaving, I always do, but it felt stronger this time, knowing how far I was going to be from home, even if it really makes little difference how far I would be, I know that.  I always have the heavy feeling anytime I am leaving those I love, not wanting to leave and knowing they want me to stay, trying so hard to hold on to even the littlest things, but also knowing I have to go and so very curious of what lies ahead, it's such an horrible feeling when you are right in the thick of it.  The long drive in the pouring rain to the airport didn't help soothe my feelings, and saying goodbye to Kevin made me feel like that girl in high school again, when we would part and I would be left with such a heavy heart. Yep, it was a tough day, but now today that I am on my way I feel much lighter, it feels good to have a day to just be. Yes, much like an unexpected gift! I know my children are in warm and loving hands and happy about the company they are having while I am away, I know I am safe and in a good place with so much to be grateful for, with much to do just here in this hotel room, I can finally add a few words to my new journal, and I can feel the excitement starting to settle in....I can hardly believe it...I am going to Australia!  That is crazy!    This morning I was sitting at breakfast and the thought came to me, who are you? What have you done with this life of yours? It's all so crazy, it really is... me, eating a beautiful breakfast of "freshly picked berries" and a side of toast, alone in L.A. at a over priced restaurant ($30 for breakfast..fruit, toast, & coffee...holy $#@!), on my way to a land so new to me, so far from here...to teach art?! Never, ever would I have guessed that I could do something like this and here I am. I guess there is a lot to say about doing what you really love to do and I really love creating, sharing, traveling, meeting new friends, seeing life from a different angle, and being here in this crazy world in which we live. I really do! So, I am going to go for now, as I have an unexpected dinner date with Shari this evening and have lots to do before then, the next time you will hear from me I am sure I will have many stories to share. I share with you today a few recent favorite photos of mine...I wish you all a very wonderful week, thank you for being here.

"To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream; not only plan, but also believe."   ~  Anatole France

Comments

[kristen]

ahhh, you are in my hometown! safe travels down under dear girl. xo

[Hashi]

Oh my, could I maybe join you both for dinner too? I work quite close to LAX ....

[kim]

good manor loves you, sweet one!!
open arms are waiting for you in australia....xoxoxo

[Shirani]

Have a GREAT time!!!!!!!!! Can't wait to see photos

[Erin Gergen Halls]

I have often, OFTEN, wondered what it feels like inside for the traveling artist/mothers who need to "leave the nest" themselves for their art. That is one part of an art-life I havent delved into. I dont know if I could. I know everyone is different, some maybe have no tearful glances back at waving babes, but you expressed exactly what I imagine it to feel like. While creating I think often of women artists from the past who either abandoned their art to raise children, or chose to not have babies to pursue their art. I feel more connection to the women who stood at an easel with a babe on the hip or clutching at her skirts. I feel a connection to an artist and mother like you. You are brave, Misty, for daring to do both. You are out there on an inspiring journey, committed, though challenged, to creation. And one only needs to look at the faces of your children to know that you are a success, too, at mothering. Bright Blessings...

[Tina]

Oh, I know your trip will be amazing! I am always weepy when I leave my family even when I'm so excited to be going. It's just what it is isn't it. Part of the journey.

[Tui]

Hi I am Hashi's Daughter from Australia. Welcome to my home Misty! Hope you REALLY enjoy your stay. (I'm sure you will)
btw...Love your blog and artwork. It's refreshing. I'm going to delve in a little deeper, Hugs!
-Tui

[Ale]

everything will be ok, enjoy and have a good trip.!
hugs,

[sperlygirl]

safe travels - enjoy the journey! thoughts are with you. take good care. xoxo

[Elizabeth]

oh my gosh-- it's all so alive alive alive-- so much goodness so much love and adventure-- can a human bean even process so much? guess you just gotta let flow and flow and enjoy all you can and let go. you are magic

and I love the borders you are doing on your photos-- love

[lucy]

Your feelings of apprehension are totally normal considering the huge journey you've embarked upon. Do try to embrace the experience, it is one that very few have the opportunity to take, you are very lucky to be able to do what you love to do and share it with so many a world away from where you started!

Enjoy Australia and have fun teaching your classes!

[Graciel]

Your life is becoming so very rich. It takes a brave soul to let it evolve. Sharing this richness, this beauty, this exquisite joy in life is part of your gift to the world.

Share on, Darling, share on.

[tess1960]

You are one very lucky lady to have not only your Art and this wonderful opportunity but also that beautiful family to come home too. Share with us, oh yes, but know that many years from now the words in this post will give those beautiful babes an insight into what it felt like to be mom on this glorious day.
Tess

[Beth]

your family, your art, your travels, your thoughts, your words, your dreams....really, could it get any better ?

hugs, beth
www.moredoors.blogspot.com

{your future VR student}

[Maija Lepore]

This was my first Mother's Day without my mom- it was very difficult, but I have so many wonderful memories of her!
I hope your trip is GRAND!

[Eileen Weigand]

Your heart is so strong and your words so tender- missing those you love is what makes you who you are- lovely.
Australia awaits a wonderful gift in your visit!! Bask in the beauty, dear lady. :)

[Greta Young]

Hi Misty,

I did -so- enjoy my class with you on Friday. I wished I had taken the Saturday one too.

So Thank you for leaving your loved ones and coming down here to teach. I did hear you say that you would definitely be back, so I guess that means you enjoyed yourself too!

[Rebecca Vavic]

Misty... I KNOW that tug well... between mother and artist/self.

As you know I experienced that at GREAT force during my learning experience in Melbourne.

I am sad that Joshua got sick, but still grateful to have met you and learnt from you.

You have an incredible talent, a beautiful nature... you have a gift and I am so thankful I was able to receive some of your magical teachings. You're a natural.

Joshua is almost 100% again and we are home safe and sound.

Is there any better feeling than coming home?

Enjoy those first few hours and days of being home again.

{hugs} and love to you Misty.
Bek xo

[kellyjeanette]

Misty you are such a sweet endearing soul. I'm not sure if you are back yet from your trip ,but I hope you are having or did have a beautiful time. I can't wait to hear about it. I've always wanted to see the land down under. Take care.

[jenn]

I hope you had a wonderful and safe trip!

[Charmingdesigns]

What an absolutely wonderful blog! Laurie