Here I am, wide awake in the middle of the night, in the bedroom I grew up in, thinking about how in the heck I can dust the months of neglect off my blog.
I have a hunch it's gonna take more than a little dusting to bring this baby back to life... but hey, here I am. It's a start?
Physically I am in my old room, but mentally I am not really sure where I am right now. I find myself stuck somewhere between where I used to be, who I used to be, where I am, who I want to be, and where I want to be. There have been a lot of recent changes that have me feeling a little turned around.
It was about a year ago my husband's company heaved a surprised forced relocation to Connecticut at him, not even a year after we had found and settled into a house we loved outside Charlottesville, VA. From there onward I lived happily in denial, thinking it wouldn't really happen, we wouldn't actually have to leave our house. He would find another job in the area and life would carry on at its usual rapid pace. Months past, no new job. So we kept putting off the official decision date... Fingers crossed that we wouldn't have to schlep all our stuff and ourselves anywhere, let alone Connecticut, where we just didn't feel made sense for us to live, being that it was even further from family and our life in VA. The job searched expanded more and more miles from our home... from Richmond, to Pennsylvania, and even California (where he was offered a job... Whole other story). Spring came along, bearing the losses of a very cold winter and unanswered questions of fate. Our bees died, both hives, as well as our beloved fig tree, and the inevitable was beginning to sink in... that we were going to have to move.
Late spring he was offered a job that he accepted in Pittsburgh, PA. He moved north without us while we finished out the school year, prolonging the whole thing. A part of me felt as though I was still searching for a way out of all of this, finally feeling at home in a town we spent seven years in, I wasn't ready to leave. Not yet. I didn't want to leave our cozy home, our friends, our familiar life but, leave we did. The main thing that made it better was knowing our family would be closer. Still, my heart hurt and I was angry, I sulked, but became tired of being a major pain in the ass, and decided to make the most of what is now.
What is now?
I suppose it's time to spread my wings and sail on...
After living with my parents for the past few weeks while everything shifted we are finally moving into our new house this weekend. We are all looking forward to the next adventure...
May it be a good one.
A few discoveries made this summer....
I can crochet,
and frozen bananas make the best "ice cream".
On the very first day of summer vacation my children and I sat down and wrote up our goals for the summer. Slightly unhinged, I had a long list of goals for this summer... way too many for what was ahead of me, I can see that clearly now. I think I accomplished maybe a third of that list and yet, I still continue to add to it. I just can't help it, there's so much I want to do... even if I do spend more time making lists than doing what's actually on my lists. My children did much better than I did with their goals. What can I say, I guess I'm a good role model? ;)
On my list is to design a web page for my pottery/art. I really hope/plan to do that once life settles down a bit. I am so, so excited to get back to my work, my painting & pottery. I am very anxious to see what has become of my work after so many weeks off. I hope to share more and more of it here, too. I also hope to catch up with my emails someday. I am so far behind, it's bad.
"All ya can do is do what you must
You do what you must do and ya do it well" - bob dylan
until next time...